Not A Saint (ENGLISH VERSION)

I was still in deep thought until we got back to Roa's house by Taxi. I don't know how to escape Ezekiel Bellevera.

"I can't allow this to happen anymore, Celestine. Starting tomorrow you will return to your home. There, you will be safe and I will not think a second thought of your safety," she is starting to nags at me again.

I was forced to nod even though I didn't really want to go back there. But since I needed to get my belongings to move to the apartment that I choose, I nodded and agreed to what Roa said.

I also need to find a training agency that will train me for martial arts. So that Bellevera wouldn't repeat what Brent was doing to me.

They thought I was okay, that I was strong. They didn't know I was devastated inside. I just look happy, beautiful, and lively but inside me is an ugly, complicated, and depressed Celestine. A rose that is not full of thorns but full of grass around. They just don't know how hard I went through when Brent was still alive.

Brent found out my secret and promised he wouldn't tell that to mom as long as he was the only one who could get ahead of me. I did nothing, at the age of eighteen back there, I could not even defend myself because I was afraid of him. My fear began when he secretly stroked the delicate parts of my body several times.

I hid everything from my mom because I could see she was happy with Brent. I didn't fight back and just accepted Brent's deal with me. I just accepted that it would be my destiny while I was with Brent at home.

Every day he took advantage of me, all over the house, in the car, outside the mansion, or even in the office, I endured it all. I was crying not in front of him. I hid and nurtured all the hardships for a long time.

The bastard Brent is lucky enough he can't get me impregnated, there's no evidence even if I report that to my mom. What good is it if I file a complaint? Mommy won't listen to me either. Until I found an idea to escape this misery of mine. And I'm glad it works. Now that there is another Brent in my life, I don't know how to escape it again especially that I don't want to do anything bad again.

A bad thing for the deserving person.

When I got to her house I collapsed and lowered my exhausting body from the trip and the accident. Maybe all parts of my body went numb because of what Brent did. My fellow model told me, I should be glad to have a family compares to others that they have been abused by their parents or stepfather nor stepmother. There are a lot who went with much tragedy that they become slaves. I should be glad that I am not a slave. I would rather be a slave than be my own uncle's slave.

I knew mommy was starting to suspect back then that Brent was believed to have a hookup and she had no idea that it was her husband's affair. How hypocrite! How miserable unlucky life I had! I thought being rich was also a joy but I was wrong. It was a nightmare, a huge nightmare.

"Do you want to eat?" I didn't notice Roa standing on the end side of the bed.

"No. I will only go out when I want to eat, "I replied to her even though the truth is that I have no intention of leaving that room. It felt like that was my haven.© NôvelDrama.Org - All rights reserved.

"Okay. Get well, the soonest. I hope it will not give you trauma. You have a lot more to come. Further."

I leaned over and said, "Thank you so much, Ms. Roa."

I waited for Roa to come out. Why don't I even have a friend? No one seems to want to befriend me.

Of course, when everyone finds out the secret I have, my modeling career will also be affected. The career I have to take care of.

I hope the airlines call me this early so that I can be calm and able to work again. When I'm at work, in the airlines, or modeling, that's the only place I feel secure and relieved. Compared to this I was always restless and not at peace. THE DAYS went fast. It seems like a few hours when I just went to Roa's house, now I'm in front of the mansion again and I need to see mommy again.

In the living room, I looked for mommy but instead of seeing mommy, I found a reflection of a monster-none other than Ezekiel Bellevera.

"Oh, hello there, my fiancè. We met again."

"Are you really following me wherever I go?" I asked annoyingly.

He grinned foolishly. A smile with the pleasure that I wanted to slaps his face. "I'm just hunting you down, eat you alive... Maybe you can think that you can hide. I can smell your scent in miles..." So gross! It's the lyrics of one of the famous songs. He said it without actually singing the lyrics.

"Stop your dirty mouth, Bellevera." He approached me and suddenly grabbed my arm.

"Do you think you can escape me? I will know and have the whereabouts wherever you go.

"Do you think I'll run away from you?" Then I pulled my arm away from his grasp. I cross my arms over my chest. "Why would I escape from you? Not someone like you should be running away. You might be the one who will run away when you find out what I really am." Why would I escape from you when I can get rid of you in my own way?

There is no reason to run away and pretend. In the end, he will also know my secret. Maybe it's just too early for me to tell him everything.

"It's not because you're brave now that I should be afraid of you. You're just a girl Celestine, you will never get on top of me. You will stay under me, whether in the house, relationship, or bed," he said meaningfully.

Go on! Have fun while you still have time Bellevera, have fun that feels it's your last because I will make sure you'll regret what you are doing. I still have a stronger attachment to the saints. And if I had to cling to the devil I would. I can only bring out the rotten systems and rotten behaviors similar to your kind, especially you.

I just passed at him and immediately went upstairs to where my room was. I don't know where my mom is but I'll get my things now.

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I'm going to gather and pack all of them and I'm just going to wait for that Bellevera-beast to go away and will not notice me. I will never allow myself to submit to him, a month, a week, a day, an hour, or even a minute more to be with him. Never.

I just arranged my things. I had to find the timing of how to escape his sight.

Everywhere I go he is always there and he seems to be really watching over me. He is like a shadow of a beast.

Of those like him that I am very afraid. But not anymore. Once Brent died I also had to face my fears. I also need to get up from my feet. I am going to be thrilled to find him Bellevera's death.

I just picked up my phone and created another social media account. This is the only way to find new allies or friends. This way, they will never be able to judge me and they will never know who I really am.

I also created a new email address that I linked to popular social media. I immediately found group chats, group rooms, and group pages there.

The first thing I need to find right away was the martial arts instructor. I had browsed videos but that won't be enough for me to learn everything quickly. I want an actual one.

I just asked and posted on that social media, maybe they know a training agency that I can join with.

My phone rang, a notification came, minutes after I posted. I read some comments right away, both pure recommendations. Company name, address, contact person, and contact number.

I immediately took screenshots. I just put it together, I will them call tomorrow or the next day.

It will only be difficult for me when my new project starts. I need to find the right timing and schedule to insert that training.

I almost toss the cellphone I was holding when suddenly there was a knock on my bedroom door. Unsatisfied with the knock, that person even forces the doorknob open. Fortunately and I locked that door.

But even locked as long as there is no double lock anyone with a copy of the key in my room can open that.

Suddenly my chest throbbed, a hard throbbing sound from my chest as I am holding my breath deeply. I am not ready at this stage of my life. I have never been able to submit to any man again especially Bellevera. The door slammed shut. Fortunately, I was covered with a blanket. I saw an image.

Nothing else but...

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I slowly lowered the blanket, making my head showed up.

"What happened to your head?" she asked in astonishment when he looked at my head which was still bandaged and I had not yet removed it.

Why didn't she ask the nice man she trusted? Why didn't she ask herself and so it will come from Bellevera's mouth the explanation for what happened to me and what she wanted to hear?

"This is nothing, mom," I replied even though I wanted to shout that it was the fault of that good man she wanted me for an arranged marriage.

"What is wrong with you, daughter. You are not like that. Why suddenly you become that stubborn? You didn't even say you were leaving. Fortunately, Roalyn told me everything."

I feel like a child about to cry and wanting to hug her. But it is very impossible for her to be concerned about what happened to me. I know mom if it wasn't about the money she wouldn't be concern about my whereabouts.

It is good to know now that she is not as drunk as she used to be. She's getting changed. But in that similar determination wasn't the same of my life.

Mom walks over to me and sat on the bed then she gently stroked my face. "I hope you understand that I also want you to improve. I know our lives will never be normal because your Daddy Brent is gone. But I will stay with you, my daughter." How I wish everything was true. How I wish she could fulfill those.

She just pulled me up to give me a quick kiss on the top of my head.

"Take a rest. And if you leave, I hope you will say goodbye at least. If you can't, just leave a letter. I can understand everything."

I hope so. Hopefully, she will be the first person to understand me after all. All of this.

I love you so much, mom. Even though this is how I am. I will stay loving you, mom.

Mom came out after making sure I was lying down and comfortable sleeping.

When you wake up, I may not be here at home again or it may be a long time before we meet again, mommy.